In Tweet Your Kids, Tweet Your Kids #2 , Tweet Your Kids #3 and Tweet Your Kids #4, I wrote “Ever think ‘I should write that down’ when your child says something funny?”
I use Twitter for that. Here’re some Tweet-worthy comments from my boys.
Six-year-old Lucas
Lucas putting out fires
Dad trying to watch video. Lukey: “Daddy, is that our Master?” Dad: “Yes, that is President Obama.”
Lucas: “Mom, Dad? Do you have to squeeze the adult elephant’s trunk to get the baby out?”
6yo Lucas trying to distract me: “Look outside, Dad! A billion moneys!”
Lucas talking back. Dad: “Why don’t I just put you in a box?” Lucas: “Oh, hello??! I would not like that!”
Stratego explained by a 5 year old [YouTube video]
Zach plays one piano song over + over. Dad: “I wish you would add something else to your repertoire.” Zach: “Web-a-jar?” Luke: “Butt-a-jar!”
Lucas: “What is that [tampon] for? Your penis?” Momma: “I don’t have a penis.” Lucas: “For your hole penis?”
6yo Luke: “This rice has an acid taste.” Daddy: “I don’t think you know what ‘acid’ means.” Luke: “You’re right! I don’t!”
6yo @LukeHage got a scrape on his ankle. “Dad, I think I’m going to need crutches.”
Luke hasn’t quite got the concept of death yet: “Is it uncomfortable to live underground?”
6yo @LukeHage: “Dad, can we go on YubaTube and see crashing bikes? Like people falling down and they’re getting hurt?”
6yo @LukeHage to the Momma: “How come you have three private parts?”
The Momma: “Lucas! He goes first. He’s the guest.” @LukeHage: “No, he’s not! I met him before!”
“Daddy, do you know what your anus is? It’s a hole in your butt!” Insight from @LukeHage
The Momma: “Lukey, what’s on your forehead?” @LukeHage: “I think it is bee poop.”
6yo @LukeHage: “Daddy, I ate all of it so I can have flab like you!”
Witty retort(?) from 6yo @LukeHage: “Daddy, you’re a big pair of glasses!”
Eight-year-old Zachary
Zach's first communion
8yo @ZachHage: “I never tell a girl she’s flabby b/c I don’t know if she’s pregnant or not.”
Daddy: “What do you think would happen if Daddy tried the luge?” Zach: “Die. Because you are too lazy.” Nice.
Zachary got duped by a leprechaun he was trying to trap. “I know that trick. Thanks for the coin,” the leprechaun wrote back.
Caller: “Beth?” Zach: “It’s Zach!” Caller: “Oh, you sound so old!” @ZachHage: “I know! Because I’m eight!”
Struck by generosity. @ZachHage told a woman on a Disneyland shuttle abt his fundraising. She just gave $100!
Have some kid gems? Leave them in the comments!
:: Joe Hage ::
Speak Your Mind